mid-year resolutions.

in true non-conformist fashion, i'm creating a new tradition called "mid-year resolutions" for my life. here's my list so far:

-memorize more scripture, poetry, and literature...especially shakespeare.
-continue running daily, and hopefully build up to a long race in 2012.
-read the newspaper at least once a week.
-learn to play the guitar so i can worship god in a new way.
-refresh my piano skills.
-write songs more often, and sing them.
-be better at staying in touch with america.
-watch more movies. i currently watch maybe two a year.
-pursue active recovery.

this last one sparked my making this list in the first place. ten years ago this coming december 31st, i said goodbye to a life of active drug use and began pursuing physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health for myself. i attended 90 meetings in 90 days, i worked the 12 steps, i had a sponsor, i joined the choir at church, i learned to play guitar, i ran a half-marathon, i wrote various articles and chapters for a book...in true addict fashion, i swung dramatically in the opposite direction and became nazi-ish about my full recovery from years of addictive addiction. i was in what i call active recovery.

then life happened.

so, now i'm coming out of the fog, and my first step now has to be my first step then. i have to pursue active recovery. i have to attend 12-step meetings.i have to sing and dance and play music (another part of my own inner healing involves privately stalking all my favorite bands by going to their shows alone and dancing freely like the true hippy i am). i have to run. i have to write and express myself creatively. i have to find accountability in the vulnerable areas of my life.

these are my mid-year resolutions. perhaps by publishing them for the masses, i'll be driven to follow through with them. sometimes my pride comes in handy :)

here's a quote for you from my reading from "how al-anon works" yesterday, page 90. it is also important to be reminded that feelings aren't fact. no matter how intense the feelings may be, they are only feelings. they are reactions to, rather than reflections of, reality. therefore, they are not necessarily the best basis for decision-making. other people can help us to value the experience of our emotions without acting on them in ways that we might regret once the feelings have passed.

hallelooooooooooooooooooooojah.